Monday, July 20, 2009
There is NO other way! A Brief History of Capitalism.
Capitalism was invented 17 years ago by Reginald Capitalism. When attending a barter market, Reginald happened upon a gentleman who wanted to exchange two piglets for eleven yarns of Reginald's celebrated wool. Instead of this, Reginald proposed that the gentleman give him several circular pieces of brass (that would be provided to the gentleman by Reginald himself at a fixed rate of interest) in exchange for the wool and that Reginald return the pieces of brass for the piglets. Confused and somewhat put off, the gentleman declined to partake of this new form of exchange. However, Reginald's idea eventually caught on and the value of things have since become increasingly free form and experimental, like a kind of economic Bee Bop improvisation by a particularly demented saxophonist who is tripping off his head on acid and trying to exorcise the monkey on his back.
In some quarters, thanks to capitalism, the value of things and the transactions of those things have become so avant-garde that things that don't exist are being bought and sold with imaginary pieces of brass.
There are said to be whirling dervishes in Wall street, ensuring that faith triumphs over reality. Let's hear it for Capitalism!
Labels:
bar stewards,
capitalism,
comic,
economics,
free market,
Fugger,
Irish,
Milton Friedman,
money,
neoliberal,
satire,
stock market
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1 comment:
"Capitalism" spells "Msilatipac" backwards. "M'sil-atipac" is a derivation of an ancient word from the congo-niger region meaning "man, this be all fucked up and shee."
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