Once upon a time,
...everyone woke up and moved their lips to speak but the only sound that came out was the sound of a klaxon. An alarming, blaring, enraging, fucking klaxon.
And everyone cleared their throats, but it did no good.
And everyone rinsed out their mouths, but it did no good.
And everyone sucked a lozenge, but it did no good.
And everyone was very unhappy because they thought they would never get the chance to insult each other again.
So everyone went on the internet, to type their insults into cyberspace, but when they placed their hands on their keyboards everyone saw that their fingers had turned into logs of shit. Ten logs of shit was all they had, five per hand. And everyone was startled to see their shit fingers and everyone screamed, but all they emitted was a terrible klaxon sound.
So there everyone was, honking and weeping in front of computers that were covered in shit.
But after a while, everyone adjusted because people can adjust to anything. The human race is a very adaptable species.
And in no time at all, it felt like nothing had ever changed and everyone just carried on. Instead of insulting each other they just honked at each other and instead of typing callous and cruel remarks into the internet, they just smeared shit all over their computer screens.
And they lived happily ever dafter.