Do you hear the salty briney bastard grinding its teeth? All day and all through the night. For as long as there has been a world. Churning and fooshing. Splashing. Spurting. Squirting. Loads of it. Massive amounts of it. Imagine lying at the bottom of it. Imagine it sitting on your chest. Crushing your ribs and denying you breath. A soundless death in the soundless depths.You wouldn't fuck with it. The scrotumtightening assassin. The snotgreen murderer. It'll kill ya! It was once a friend of mine. It played with me when I was a child. Lifting me in its swells and gently putting me back down again. But then I found the dog, drowned, circled by flies, wrapped in seaweed like ribbons and bows on a parcel. A sick gift. Spat up and left on the wet sand with a gurgling snigger. Why would the sea do such a thing? 'What are you going to do about it?' said the sea to me and I shrugged. The sea does what it likes. The sea is proper gangsta. The sea kicks the shit out the land and exhausted shelves collapse into it. Pwned! The sea is a tough nut, a hard chaw, a total knacker. The sea is hungry and never stops eating. It'll clean the plate - the continental plates, licked clean. Sometimes you can hear the fucker belch. Humanity crawled out from the sea on its pitiful belly and humanity will get eaten by the sea and left belly up. We'll all be soaking again soon, floated and bloated, drifting dead amongst the remains of our world. A big human stew stirred by the currents and pecked by gulls. And it won't be revenge for our folly, it will just be. The sea will decide that our time is up and we'll see it standing up, on the horizon, and rushing forward, silent at first, then hissing like static, then roaring like a monster army, charging onto the earth. It'll put this planet in its great wet blue grey green belly. It used provide us with fish suppers but soon it'll have us all for dinner.
'Like as the waves make towards the pebbled shore, so do our minutes hasten to their end.'
'Claimed by the sea and it was always going to be.'