ICTU SIPTU FUKU

(pictured – Is that Victor Jara?)

 

NO WAY! WE WON'T PAY! (well actually we will, all the same, anyway). 

Brother Number One Begg sat there on the committee of the Central Bank, presiding over the auditing of Anglo and the lads. 

We won't mention that because we don't even know - we just got out on the streets and Mundy did a song. We had a great time and all sang along. 

We let off steam and went home again and there'll be no national strike or anything like that because, fundamentally and absolutely, we're all full of crap. 

We don't really care about anything but our wage so if you don't go there we'll probably vote yous in again –
F fuckin F or F fuckin G or L fuckin A fuckin B. The alternatives to those three are fuckin comedy. 

So cut what you like, just don't cut me!
With a hey diddle dong and a fiddle dee dee.
ICTU SIPTU FUKU - Hee Hee Hee!

BERTIE AHERN

'Ah, lay off now. I did me best by yiz. I'm just a man. A normal Drumcondra fella. Love the rasher sandwiches and the Bass. Did you go see the Dubs? Man U played a blinder there, absolute blinder. The daughter likes writing the stories. Loves the bukes. Makes a few bob from that. Did an old buke meself there. A normal enough few pages. Nothing special. A modest buke of recollections and things. Do you like a buke yourself? Mine is seventeen euro. Rasher sandwiches.

Good times. Good times were had by all. There were a few blips on the landscape but we always had the few euro for the Bass. Don't mind the loopers and the whingers, the failures, failed people. Don't mind them feckin' eejits. Feckin' failures. I'd rivet them! Do you hear me? DO YA? I'd rivet that shower! I'LL RIVET THE LOT OF YE!!!!

Ah no, I'm only coddin'. Love an old cod. I love a cod but I'd prefer a Bass. That's a fish joke. Did you get that? It has a double meaning, you can read it two ways. Man U. Rasher sandwiches. Ash Wednesday. Ash Wednesday's great. Big lump of ash on the noggin there. Smudge. Big smudge of it there and then off we go for rasher sandwiches. Great days. We did right by yiz anyway. Brian's fumbled the ball a bit, not too much. Terrible when that lad painted him doin a shite in the nip. That can't have been easy. Lehmans didn't help either and now there's the uncanny darkness overtaking the place. I'd rivet that darkness. I'd rivet it but I'd rivet Higgins first! I'd rivet that bollix! Rivet him! RIVET!

The future? What of the future you ask? Well, we'll wait and see what comes. I'll still be here, still being Bertie, still watching the matches, drinking the Bass, but I might be doin' it in the Aras. Yiz still love me don't yiz? Yiz still love the Bertie. You'd love to have me up the Aras wouldn't yiz? Oh yeah, yous would n' all. Rasher sandwiches.'