Saturday, June 14, 2014


I'm an explorer of inactivity. I delve deep into dormancy. Everyone else is obsessed with doing things and seeing things get done but I'm charting a sedentary ocean. Thanks to, others can read about doing nothing and save themselves the bother of not bothering. It's a bit like reading about a mountaineering expedition but never embarking on one yourself.

Don't worry about me, sacrificing my goals is no sacrifice as I have no goals. I do not see the point in goals. Having a goal in life is not my goal in life. Somebody did once say that they thought I needed something to aim for but I aimed them for the door. Then I aimed myself for the bed and got back into it. I haven't changed the sheets since. I have my shopping delivered and I live on subsidies from academic bodies that are interested in the consequences of living an inconsequential life. Indeed, it should come as no surprise that the consequences of inconsequentiality are themselves inconsequential. That should have been obvious.

Some of those observing my shiftless existence have been inspired to embrace indolence themselves. One college professor spends his lectures napping and encourages his students to do the same. He considered writing a treatise on the formation of a new nation state for people who do nothing. He was going to propose that this state be called Inertia and not be a geographic territory but a state of mind, with citizens with rights – the right to do nothing. He didn't bother writing his treatise in the end because it would have required effort. Instead, he opted to lead by example and did nothing.

If your dream in life is to do nothing then you can easily make that dream come true. Sure, you'll eventually run out of financial means and be carried from your bed and placed on the street but you'll be moved to an institution where you'll be given shelter and fed. Rest assured, you will remain alive in your deathlike state and you'll be able to take comfort in the fact that you have achieved all of your ambitionless ambitions.

Now, I know what you're thinking. You're wondering what would become of us if we all did nothing and no one did anything to help those who had stopped doing anything because everyone was doing nothing, wouldn't we all end up dying destitute? Well perhaps but would that suffering be any worse than the suffering caused by the wars we wage and murders we commit when active? You see, lethargy is love and peace can only be achieved through the ultimate passivity - doing nothing.

Doing nothing with your time is better than wasting your time and wasting time is usually what people spend all their time doing. In fact, to do nothing with your time is to conquer time itself as it makes the concept of time obsolete. It doesn't matter what the time is when you do nothing all the time. The tyranny of temporality is overcome. You are there in bed, looking at the numbers on the digital display and pitying the pretense of punctuality. Ceasing all attempts to attempt anything is the only true way to 'beat the clock' and isn't beating the clock the ultimate goal of the deadline addicted denizens in your harried land of 'purpose'?

I rest my case. In fact, I just rest. 

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