EMOVORE

Hate for dinner and love for dessert, all washed down with a cup of relief. The Emovore feeds on human emotion. He gobbles it up and shits out ideas. He lives in your head. He is in your brain. He wriggles around in there like the creepy crawly that he is. He mainly hangs out in the deep limbic system, waiting for feelings to be cooked up and served up. He's an electrochemical feelings gobbler. He takes the feelings you feel, grabs them in his pincers, chews them up, swallows them down, digests them for a bit, and then poos out the reasons why you feel whatever emotions you feel. The Emovore poos these reasons out into the toilet of the brain. You know the brain toilet as the frontal lobe. You think the frontal lobe governs reason but to the Emovore it's just a jax.

If you hate or love something you just do. You 'feel' and then you decide why you 'feel'. Feelings come first and the reasons why you feel them come later. Reason is just shit, feeling is the food of existence. All supposedly rational thought is ex post facto and all ex post facto rationalisation is basically Emovore poo. Hitler felt a lot of hate. Why? Who knows, a specific development of a genetic trait probably. Hitler's Emovore ate up all that hate and then shat out all this ex post facto nonsense about Jews. Really though, really, really, and fundamentally, Hitler just hated. He just did. If there was no such things as Jews Hitler would have still hated and his Emovore would have shat out some other reason for it. We just feel things like the wind just blows. In fact, in pre-Socratic Greece they considered emotions might blow through us randomly like wind. They thought reason mightn't have much to do with it. They were right.

You may wonder what the purpose is for all this feeling and for all that Emovore shite dribbling down into our frontal lobes and infecting us with fanciful ex post facto notions. However, you wondering such things is just you looking for reason and, like I've already made clear, reason is shit. Reason is just an illusion. There is no such thing as reason. Reason is just Emovore poo. Got that? Reason is nothing but Emovore poo! So, now that you know what's really going on, tell me - how does it make you feel?

THE STORY OF THE HUMAN BRAIN PART TWO

Continued from the Previous Post. . .
Chapter Three:
The human brain is mainly concerned with two things. The survival of the human body is the first and making the human body’s survival an enjoyable experience is the second. The human brain learns how to do the latter with the information it receives from the telly. The telly knows how to make the human body’s survival an enjoyable experience because it was told how to by the shops. The shops are collectively known as The Market and The Market is controlled by a collection of human brains that have gone insane because they have taken in too much information simultaneously (see chapter two in the previous post).
Chapter Four:
Sane human brains being guided by the insanity of The Market is one of the many paradoxes the human brain must endure in its search for ways to make the survival of the human body enjoyable. Another paradox is found in the existence of consciousness and indeed conscience. Conscience is a by-product of consciousness and serves to create moral and philosophical reasoning that may or may not be reasonable. Different human brains will favour different reasonings and often find themselves in disagreement.
An example:
Wife:
I think the people of the world would find contentment in a non-merchant capitalist society based on a principle of direct and inclusive democracy. What do you think?
Husband:
I think you should quit yer yapping coz I’m trying to watch the golf.
Wife:
I think you’re a monster.
Husband:
I think that cat you adopted is a monster. Now make me a sandwich.
Disagreements like the above can lead to the survival of the human body being a less enjoyable experience. To prevent this, human brains, once again, resort to the information filter known as the telly for guidance and the telly resorts to the shops which are collectively known as The Market and The Market is controlled by a collection of human brains that have gone insane because they have taken in too much information simultaneously (see chapter two in the previous post).
But:
There
Is
No
Alternative!
And that is the story of the human brain.
The End.

THE STORY OF THE HUMAN BRAIN PART ONE

Introduction:
The human brain is the most important organ in the human body. This is because it tells the other organs what to do. The human brain tells the whole human body what to do. The human body is just a vehicle and the human brain is its driver. The human brain tells the human body to do things like sit down or get up or stand up, stand up for your rights, get up, stand up, don't give up the fight. Ah no. That last part is a joke. I’m only having a little joke. The human brain doesn’t tell the human body to do things like that. No. Most of the time the human brain will just tell the human body to do things like get out of bed, go to work, make a cup of tea, insult the wife, and all that sort of thing.
Chapter One:
The human brain decides everything. The human brain decides what is nice and what is not nice. The human brain decides what is scary and what is funny.
An example:
The human brain uses the human eyes to watch the human body’s wife coming in the door with a large bag of groceries. She suddenly trips over a mangy stray cat that she insisted on adopting even though it is unfriendly and ugly. The human body’s wife lets out a yelp before landing flat on her ass. The groceries fall out of the bag and roll about on the floor around her. The cat hisses and runs away. The human brain decides that this is funny and laughs. ‘Ha Ha Ha!’ goes the human brain and then the human mouth copies the human brain and says ‘Ha Ha Ha!’ Then the human body’s wife nurses her sprained ankle as her human brain wonders how her human body came to be married to someone so inhuman.
Chapter Two:
The human brain makes decisions based on information it receives. The human brain is designed to take in information. The Universe is huge and full of incredible events and observable phenomena, all unfolding and taking place at once. If the human brain was to absorb the events and phenomena of the Universe all at once then the human brain would cease to function properly. This is called going insane. To make sure it does not go insane, the human brain absorbs information in small doses and places that information in context. The human brain does this by using a filter and that filter is called the telly.

Please return for the rest of the story of the human brain in the next post.
To be continued but, for now, here’s a song. . .